On Gaia.

Strange as it seems, no amount of learning can cure stupidity, and higher education positively fortifies it.
Stephen Vizinczey

Many of you may not know this about me but I am crazy about Gaia. It's a website where trolls are actually funny and mean at the same time and where if you go to the rallies you'll meet a 15 year old guy hitting on a 20 year old girl [this could happen even in the towns but rallies seem to be where people are going know-a-days]. And I know you must be wonder "What's your point?" WELL my point is this: Those stupid dumb people in the forums claim they have a 'blog' which is false cause it only likes me to tumblr. Tumblr guys is NOT a blog. I don't care what you think it's NOT. It's like twitter but with images and music. There are some tumblrs that can be considers blogs but I doubt yours is one of them. Label your shit correctly bro and I won't have a problem next time cause I will know "Hey that's there tumblr and not a real blog."

Know to the quote of the day. It's mostly related to the incurable thing, stupidity. I know we all suffer from it, even I do sometimes. But the thing is that if you are ignorant and not plain stupid and you have some cells in your brain working then stop looking like a fucking retard. Okay? That's great now that you know your brain is some what functioning take some time and think before you do anything. I don't care how long you think but remember there is a long term punishment for everything you do. Remember that statement so next time you want to do something stupid remember there is going to be some sort of long term punishment that will come about at some point after that. Whether that be not getting a job, losing someone you love [bf/gf] or you know just regretting it, just have me in your head chatting this one sentence "I told you so you idiot."

I stated enough for today. "Murrrr"

Girl out ;]

He's moved on.

I heard that you're settled down

That you found a girl and you're married now.

I heard that your dreams came true.

Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you.

-Adele

Who moved on? That guy whom you where always in love with did. Mine finally told me he "moved on". And it hurts more than I realized. Today sitting in my class it finally sunk in when I tried to text him, it didn't even go through, that it was really truly over between us. He's moving on... That scary thought filled my head and well guys I won't lie I did start to tear up and my breathing did begin to become a bit ragged. It hurts a lot. Which brings me to the quote, turns out he is seeing a new girl and has become more committed to another girl and further from me.

I childishly yearn to be able to tell him that he isn't allowed to move on and that he is just mine but I know that even if I love him we are over. And that is something I must realize. Through all this pain and suffering I must realize that I fucked up when I was that age and that I have no right to even be allowed to love him as much as I do. Hell my love can only be described as a burning flame, which can be warm and at the same time burn every part of my heart till I just want to curl up and cry.

Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

-Adele

Really who would have known that love could feel like this? It is so burning and painful I can help but want to not breathe in this love I feel and felt for him. I want to move on but with every guy I truly love I give them a piece of me and I gave him the biggest chunk. He was the first guy I ever fell for with true naivety. He was the first man who truly touched me with his love and he has been the only man who left him mark upon my heart and my very soul.

I wish nothing but the best for you

Don't forget me, I begged

-Adele

I just want him to know that I don't want to be forgotten even if he moves on even if he is happy even if he achieves his dreams. I don't want him to forget the pain he has put me through and at the same time I want him to become all he can be. I lack the word that can describe it. This feeling of loathing that he is happy and has just forgotten all the pain he has inflicted on my younger self. I wouldn't want anyone to feel the emotional down I had after being heartbroken like that. And as I am typing this the tears are there... I just don't want to be sad anymore. I want to be done with all these tears of sorrow and move on.

Please don't forget me.

A Post For A Friend. (Several in fact...)

Friendship is a pretty full-time occupation if you really are friendly with somebody. You canít have too many friends because then youíre just not really friends.

First person who ever asked for a blog post about them is the most stupidest person ever to walk the face of this Earth. I asked them not the other way around. Guess I just that nice of a person huh?

First batter up is my guy friend Issac (geekbro) who I meet on my TC (Tinychat). He is 21 and welllll I don't know much about him other than that. No just kidding! He is from a state that has crazy hot climate and no, it's not Texas. He is pretty awesome in the fact that he studies coding in many different formats and is just super freaking awesome <3 He may possible format this blog. Hopefully possible. Because this blog hasn't been modified in more than a year.

Next person up is the fucking love of my world, Cowie. <3 She is soooo cool and her art OMG her ART! Soooo coooool like you think I am kidding but even her doodling is awesome. If you ever get art from her you are the most coolest person ever. And also the fact that she is just so awesome could play a roll in a lot of things. XP HER ACCENT IS AMAZING FOR A BRIT <3 Just saying. Not too posh but just right <3 I am not allowed to speak of how we meet (*coughcoughPORNcoughcough*) because she will possible kill me if I mention the details of the whole situation. :P

Third person is another love of my life, DAVIEH. Okay Dave you get like on more sentence before I end your paragraph. Sorry. Just Kidding DAMN. Anyway Dave you are almost not really never mind won't finish this sentence cause it will end up being a lie. No I really do care a lot about both you and Cowie and you two play a huge HUGE role in my life. Please don't leave me OKAY? Good glads you understand that.

Okay next up to the pate is my newly befriended friend Emeeee (or Knives or Adventuretime) she is this really awesome super cool chick who spends most of her day with me on TC. The best part about her is that she is just there to talk to me and a good person to vent at. Also she is REALLY funny. I recommend you all befriending her in case you are in need of just an awesome friend!

OKAY HERE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT OF IMPORTANT PEOPLE: Chelsea. (ghostly whispers) You deserved all the caps in front because you literally mean make my world. You are like the yin to my yang. Or something like that. I really think without you I would become deflated and not be able to roll out of bed each morning after staying up super late in order to spend as much time as I can talking and seeing your face. Literally I think about you a lot. Not like a lot lot but enough to like freaking love you so much. You are like a close sibling.

Okay next is you Sin aka Steph. You are such a pretty girl! OMG! Like honestly I really really adore you! You are like a little sibling in my opinion. I literally adore you. Not so much as I do with Chelsea but almost as much. But still I love you and you are really important to me.

Next and most likely last is Thomas. I don't want to say to much because I am not sure how I feel about you just yet. Sorry. I like you a lot though which is important but I know this feeling is one I will soon get over... hopefully But for now I will write something rather than nothing. I love your voice and the way you talk. I adore your randomness. :D There I said something.


There know you guys know what I like about you. Be proud if you are mentioned be sorry if you don't. Yell at me if I didn't mention you and you are someone that you KNOW I like and talk to a lot. You have every right to be here if you consider yourself close to me.

A Wild Post Appeared!

"Life can be a challenge, life can seem impossible, it's never easy when there is so much on the line. But you and I can make a difference.”
-Pokemon

So blog.. it's been a long long very long time. It's almost x-mas and the last time I posted was July last year. Please don't hate me D: I know I only have like on person who reads this and I know this wasn't really popular back then but now I truly promise to attempt to post daily. Anyway here is a fast update on my life.

I moved last year in October to a town not to far from my old on but it is a completely different group of people. I have started taking up cooking classes and have found out that I am passionately in love with cooking and food and baking. (That was an extreme surprise to me.) I finally moved on from A.S. and have also moved on from that horrible man named Jeff. And no blog I do not mean my brother but the only guy who ever really broke my heart.

I also found out the Jeff change his phone number and I no longer feel this need to stalk after him and what not. That clingy feeling I felt towards him has finally faded. And it's a really really really good feeling. Not going to lie. I like the idea of no longer needed him like I once did. I am also single again. Another thing I really really hate. And I have begun to mature a lot more than when I was 12 and pretended to be 18. I have become a women. Something I didn't know how it felt. I have finally become the person I aimed to be. Well not really. But oh well I thought it would be something clever to say.

Anyway, I also WORK! I know something I didn't mention was I work. I started working over the summer but recently got laid off for the winter and will be rehired in the warmer months. Which is bad and good. I get a break but the break is way to long. I need to work even if it is in the smallest form. I LIKE the idea of being in a kitchen or apart of the waitstaff carrying meals out and what not and just you know being in my field.

The quote that I chose relates a lot to where I am in life. Cause I have seen all these new obstacles have suddenly appeared. It's like battling tons of Pokemon and become stronger with each battle you face. I have become stronger and more matured just like a Pokemon. I would like to point one thing out though that Pikachu should be a level 100 and should have evolved like 2 seasons ago. But oh well. Don't matter much to me. Hahaha.

I also want the world to know that I have learned I have this problem of getting attached to people easily. And I can't help it when I say I love you there is some form of an attachment to it. Even if you are a female. If I tell you I love you then I just want you to know that I mean it and that I would hate for anything bad to ever happen to you. Cause you mean a lot to my world and without you I wouldn't be able to survive. Understand? See this is something I suffer from that and that fact that I fall for pretty people with ugly personalities. Another problem I am trying to correct.

Next on my list of things to write about is that I am currently semi attached to someone. I am sorry for that. I don't mean to feel attached to you it just happens. I can't help it. And it hurts a lot when I don't see you online and it hurts a lot when I feel this way and I honestly just want it to go away. I really don't like feeling this way about you. Cause it HURTS. >/

Also I just want the world to know I AM OFFICIALLY BLOGGING AGAIN! I will be posting daily with whatever rants and or comments I wish to make. Also sorry if my post are long and boring I will make sure to have some sort of drama related information in them but that is highly doubtful.

How strange I sent one thing to this and it got completely messed up.. WEIRD.

It said

"Won't post much since I am running off to find lover sorry bloggers~"

Timeless

Thoughts are eching through the brain. Sorry no quote to describe today. I am in a point where school is almost over. One more final and then the Senoirs graduate and leave. No sure how this makes me feel. Or if it even makes me care anymore. But hey I don't have to come to school only for three hours for my final! Yay? Not really.

Today I had zero finals so I went to hang out with my best friend who invited my crush to tag along since he had nothing to do and I have been avoiding him for a little while... And then I got all depressed because it click. They are meant to be together... This is the worste momment of my life. I am completely imperfect and I can't stand it anymore. Then I would go off by myself to think. And by thinking I mean zone out in a really depressed way while they cuddled.

She even broke his braclet and started crying over it since his girlfriend gave it to him. I mean why cry over spilt milk? He is going to break up with her anyway or get his heart completely fucked over but who really cares? I mean sure as hell not me. Why would I care if my best friend is like hitting on my crush? I mean how many times has she done this already? A million? I mean she is like a vagina blocking friend? Correct answer: Yes. She is the pretty hotter out going girl that can make any guy fall in love with her. And why should I care? Well I don't or at least I am trying not to.

Now onto why how she always seems to take the guy I like away.. Is she jealous? Does she like making me this way when she practically has every guy falling over her. And I have how many guys? Errr ZERO. Except the douche bags of the poplulation of male whom happen to you know? SUCK. But hey I can't complain anymore since I got that out of my system. Moving on. I auctly started crying after not crying for a month I FUCKING CRIED. And why? Cause the world fucking hates me and thinks that nothing good can come out of being a NOBODY like myself. Poor unfortunate me.

That Magical FUCKING CRAZY RETARDED FUCKED UP,

'It' Girl

Sleep over central

Dreams are a wish your heart makes
-Disney

Sooo today is sunday and I have NEVER posted on the weekends which is slightly because of my lack of intrest. But this weekend I got to have the best sleep over. Why? Because my best friend NEVER EVER has sleep overs. Except this one time when we practically beg her grand parents and they actually said yes! OMG. They said YES. That was the best ten secounds of my life. I actually had a penis and balls.

So we watched AIW(Alice in Wonderland) which was a slight fail seeing as we went to bed right afterwards. Where is the fun in that? Well does it really matter? YES IT DOES. >O We should have stayed up, lazy bums! >.<

Noooo jpjpjp(Just playing) I love her <3

Tonight I am studying for all my finals that are taking place over the next two weeks. Must admit I really don't like them but that's okay. I know I am going to get a semi good grade. :) Or at least I will try too.

Crush status? Not good. I sort of snapped at him and now we aren't talking. :[ He is completely ignoring me. But oh well. It is better to move on then stay put on this one person. I can't let him be my whole world. My world is too big for it to just be all about him. Though I am worried about him and his girlfriend. Why? Well she isn't the most loyal of people and she already cheated on him. Wait did she actually cheat on him or did she make it up? I am totally not sure but then again she is an attention whore for a reason.

All my mean words aren't meant to attack her or be a cruel person I am just stating the facts here. I mean the truth does hurt everynow and then. But for him to still be with her is what hurt me the most. The fact that he is a willing puppet really pisses me off. He doesn't understand my feelings and I don't think he would ever be able to full understand how much I love him.. It hurts. It's like being shot point blank with a gun right into my heart. My heart's destroyed. Completely torn up from his own hands. And I can't get over it.

So moving on to other crushes: I have this guy who nickname is JCL. I totally like him. Haven't yet felt that feeling of love yet but he will help me get over the one I truely love. I can't get over the little things though. But can anyone?

Anyway I better sign off for the day,

The 'It' Girl v.2k10